Having a random hookup so left but love u
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
