I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Randomize