im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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