you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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