capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
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Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
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You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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