Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
