Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
