I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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