So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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