Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
Randomize