Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
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pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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