Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
God gave him joint rollers for hands
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Randomize
