his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize