I'm so fucking centered right now
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Randomize
