i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
