i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Bring me that man meat
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
