u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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