hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'