I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
He felt like a one man threesome
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
