I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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