I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Randomize
