Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
