You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize