I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Randomize
