The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
