actually, I'm a sock model
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Randomize
