Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
we're so committed to being not committed
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