um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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