So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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