Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize