I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Randomize
