i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize