I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
