ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
