I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
