i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
