It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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