It's like God shit irony all over that family
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
