New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Come on in and take your pants off
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