Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
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