I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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