I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
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i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
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I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
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