i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
