Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
