im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
