My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Randomize
