bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
