girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
You ruined the universe
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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