I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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