Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
